HONOR IS AS HONOR DOES

Picture a small cottage at the edge of a green forest. Add a bored, angelic youngster. “Mama, may I go outdoors and pick flowers?”

“Why yes. But, don’t go into the forest. There are pretty daffodils in the meadow over the hill. The forest is much too dangerous for a little girl.”

“Okay.”

Goldilocks disobeys, goes into the woods, stumbles on a cute little house, explores much too freely and winds up staring into the faces of three not so happy bears. She jumps out of bed and runs home never to venture into the woods again, so we are led to believe.

I’m thinking the sequel will read, “Goldilocks and the Case of the Stolen Cookies.” For the moment, Mama’s tested instructions proved to be true.

Many children, especially today, don’t trust grown ups. In some cases, those children may have very good reasons not to. For you see, respect is earned. God is perfect, but we humans fall far short of His perfection. Our children will be the first to recognize just how far from perfect we are. How then, do we imperfect beings generate respect from our critical relatives? By being imitators of Christ and being the first to offer respect.

Paul’s formula for a happy home is based on all members holding one another in high regard. Husbands and wives are commanded to respect one another. Why? Because children learn from example. Simple as that.

Interestingly, Paul addresses the parents first. Then he instructs the children to honor their parents, “in all things.” The Greek word here denotes “value.” And when we value something, we don’t discard it. We hold the object near and dear to our hearts. Paul also expects this honor to be given unconditionally. That is, the respect offered is not patterned on the other’s position or ability to reciprocate.

When we read Paul’s admonitions, many of us tremble when we count our mistakes. Shirley visited her daughter in the early stages of her first pregnancy. She peeked at her daughter’s book, What to Expect When You’re Expecting. Within a few minutes, she tossed the book aside. “I did it all wrong,” she said. “I had a playpen with bars. I placed my babies on their tummies to help eliminate gas. I told them never to go outside with wet hair because they would catch cold. Now I find out that, too, was a lie.”

Her daughter laughed. “You did the best you could with what you knew. But when it comes to love, you had it all right.”

Loving our family members as Christ loved us is what counts. No matter what our home situation is, the opportunity to display that love abounds. Whether single or married, whether childless or having a quiver full. No matter how old or young we are—no matter how poor or wealthy—no matter how powerful or lowly of station, each and every one of us has the opportunity to demonstrate that same unconditional love that Christ freely extends to us.

“Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children, and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God”
(Ephesians 5:1 NIV).

Burnt Toast and Whispering Breezes

I couldn't understand it. I had mimicked her stance to perfection. Her drives rarely missed the fairway. I reasoned that if I did everything exactly as she did, then I should be as good a golfer. Committed to my false assumptions, I struggled the entire season with poor results. Then on a hot and sunny day, when our shadows stretched across the fairway, the reason for my failed swing became clear.
All a matter of height. I stood half a foot taller than my mentor. She had developed her perfect swing to fit her five-foot-two frame. The truth hit me like a fast flung nine-iron or if Tiger Woods himself had uttered the maxim. No golf technique is designed as universally applicable.

On the off-season, I studied golf magazines especially for women and watched more women’s tournaments. I discovered even among the greats, a swing was personal. The end desire might be the same—longer fairway drives and putts that sink—but everything else about the swing seemed catered to that golfer.

Some players used visualization techniques. Seeing the ball in action before they hit. Others used approach techniques that were one of a kind. From left-hand players, tall players, and overweight players, the whole approach to the game varied according to their individual tastes and practices.

As I thought about the variant aspects to golf, I realized the implications applied to my spiritual life as well. “I prayed the exact words Elijah prayed, Lord? Why didn’t the fire come down for me?”

It took awhile, but I finally realized why. First of all, Elijah’s actual prayer had been uttered in a language I didn’t understand then translated for my benefit. Secondly, his prayer was used in a specific way for a specific need.
Likewise, when we witness to others, we insist on using Golden Arches in our testimony. We fail to realize that God has a swing for everyone and for every situation. Paul mentions his desire to be adaptable so that more men would come to know God. For the jailer, he would forego the opportunity of escape. For the tempest-tossed seaman, he endured shipwreck. For the Greeks, he appealed to their belief in an unknown God. He reminded the Hebrews of their heritage.

Through the might of His great love, God has designed a unique package for every sinner He woos. He will do whatever He must to bring us to enlightenment. He may present himself in the whisper of a breeze or the thunderous trail of a tornado. He may reveal himself through the cry of a newborn infant or through burnt toast. He may rein us in or give us slack. The method He chooses has been designed specifically for the recipient of His love.

He is "all things to all people" that some may choose to believe. “I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some” (I Corinthians 9:22b NIV).