Free to Be the Me God Wants: Part X
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin (Hebrews 4:15 NIV).
“I don’t understand it,” I told my friend. “When Dad passed away, I mourned but not for a long time. Why is it so hard to get over my mother’s death?”
Like many people, I thought grief could be measured like days, weeks, and months. I wanted to take a pill and get over the uncomfortable feelings. But in reality, grief is not something we get over. Loss is permanent. But we can get through the pain of change and emerge stronger in our faith. The International Bible Society’s treatise of grief states, “And yet, according to Scripture, grief is not entirely negative. It gives us a heart of wisdom—it deposits a spiritual and emotional understanding that is not found on the outskirts of human existence, but at the very center of what it really means to be alive.”
Any loss can cause grief, including: loss of personal relationship, loss of physical health, loss of income, loss of financial security, or the loss of freedom. Seemingly less significant issues may cause us to mourn such as: moving away from home, changing jobs, selling the family home, or retirement.
Grief hurts. The body may go through a host of physical reactions such as fatigue, nausea, lowered immunity, weight loss or weight gain, aches and pains, and insomnia. Initially, one may feel shock or disbelief then profound sadness. Some experience intense guilt over words said or not said, actions taken or not taken, and feelings felt or not felt. Significant loss may trigger intense fear. Some are angry and direct that anger toward God. One mourner confessed, “I shook a fist at God for five years.”
Psychology experts suggest many ways to cope with grief; chiefly: laughter, rest, relaxation, support groups or counseling, and acknowledgment of the hurt we feel. GriefNet.org and Compassionate Friends have on-line support groups. Hospice also offers bereavement services. But, for the believer, having an honest dialogue with God is the first step toward healing and comfort. Doubt is not evidence of a lack of faith unless we allow our doubt to keep us from the One who has the answers. As the song says, “Lord, I believe, help my unbelief.”
Many scriptures remind the believer that loss is a common human experience. Jesus understands our loss, because He himself experienced loss. Though divine, he became flesh and willingly surrendered to associated indignities of the flesh. His obedience led to His death on the cross. (Philippians 2:6)
Isaiah 53 shows us how the Messiah would die to alleviate our grief. Other scriptures tell us that Christ binds up our wounds. The Hebrew words translated as “bind up” means to wrap around. Christ wraps His Grace around us to help us transcend to a place of peace. Our Lord understands our pain. He is the Someone who passed through grief’s door and came out the other side. Though we may never know the why, we know the Who.
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin (Hebrews 4:15 NIV).
Like many people, I thought grief could be measured like days, weeks, and months. I wanted to take a pill and get over the uncomfortable feelings. But in reality, grief is not something we get over. Loss is permanent. But we can get through the pain of change and emerge stronger in our faith. The International Bible Society’s treatise of grief states, “And yet, according to Scripture, grief is not entirely negative. It gives us a heart of wisdom—it deposits a spiritual and emotional understanding that is not found on the outskirts of human existence, but at the very center of what it really means to be alive.”
Any loss can cause grief, including: loss of personal relationship, loss of physical health, loss of income, loss of financial security, or the loss of freedom. Seemingly less significant issues may cause us to mourn such as: moving away from home, changing jobs, selling the family home, or retirement.
Grief hurts. The body may go through a host of physical reactions such as fatigue, nausea, lowered immunity, weight loss or weight gain, aches and pains, and insomnia. Initially, one may feel shock or disbelief then profound sadness. Some experience intense guilt over words said or not said, actions taken or not taken, and feelings felt or not felt. Significant loss may trigger intense fear. Some are angry and direct that anger toward God. One mourner confessed, “I shook a fist at God for five years.”
Psychology experts suggest many ways to cope with grief; chiefly: laughter, rest, relaxation, support groups or counseling, and acknowledgment of the hurt we feel. GriefNet.org and Compassionate Friends have on-line support groups. Hospice also offers bereavement services. But, for the believer, having an honest dialogue with God is the first step toward healing and comfort. Doubt is not evidence of a lack of faith unless we allow our doubt to keep us from the One who has the answers. As the song says, “Lord, I believe, help my unbelief.”
Many scriptures remind the believer that loss is a common human experience. Jesus understands our loss, because He himself experienced loss. Though divine, he became flesh and willingly surrendered to associated indignities of the flesh. His obedience led to His death on the cross. (Philippians 2:6)
Isaiah 53 shows us how the Messiah would die to alleviate our grief. Other scriptures tell us that Christ binds up our wounds. The Hebrew words translated as “bind up” means to wrap around. Christ wraps His Grace around us to help us transcend to a place of peace. Our Lord understands our pain. He is the Someone who passed through grief’s door and came out the other side. Though we may never know the why, we know the Who.
